Everything is looking up and I barely even think about josh anymore!!! It’s pretty cool! :’) I think he’s loving his new job and staying happy, even though I haven’t heard from him. I think I’m moving on!!! This whole experience was really hard but I learned that I can actually have feelings for someone. And that I can survive losing someone that I really care about! I’m happy that I got to spend a few months with him. And now I’m happy to be moving on and be happy with someone that likes me as much as I like them!!! It’s great!!!
Sigh. I’m scared as heck about a lot of things. I am so impulsive and I’m just going in a downward spiral. It didn’t matter at first but now it’s affecting other people and I need to fix it. I’m being dramatic. I don’t want to die. But I just wish I was never born.
Anonymous asked: Be patient. Gingers are a special breed. They are a minority in the gene pool for a reason. The people that surround them long to be like them, be a part of them, be the same soul, but can never be. Enjoy the friends that surround you and spend your energy on them. However, the true loving soul that you seek will not be among them. Gingers have the right one picked out for them at birth. Only that particular soul will be able to fulfill their every desire and love.
… This is such a strange message and I’m just going to leave it here for everyone to feel as uncomfortable about it as I do…
Anonymous asked: Your blog is cool and fine but honestly your pictures disgust me. You're a very pretty girl so there's seriously no need to get on your hands and knees and look like a tramp. You're pretty and probably nice enough of a girl to get attention for who you are. As a guy I can honestly say you're a nice looking girl but never in my life would I EVER want to be romantically involved with someone who posts pictures like that. Cheers.
Damn b, that sucks. You’re missin’ out. As a girl, I can honestly say that I would NEVER want to be romantically involved with an asshole like you. It sucks that you took the time to write such a doodoo baby message to me like this. :(((( People like you disgust me. B)
Boys are cool. It’s cool meeting people who are genuinely interested in hanging out with me. I was talking to sirena and patty about it, they made me realize. Like, yeah, it felt amazing feeling the way I felt about josh. But imagine how it would feel to feel that way about someone who feels the same way about me. Wowee. B) I can’t even imagine how happy I will be. (◡‿◡)~
Anonymous asked: The window to the soul lies in the eyes. You have a soul that will forever drain the life out of men of all ages. Take advantage of that by using men to get what you want instead of being nieve and believing that the one true soul for you is at college or in your life at this time. When you find that one soul that is your mirror, you will know and they will know. Be strong and hold yourself accountable to your life. Be alone and free for now.
Easier said than done, my friend. I’m trying. I’m in a really unfamiliar place in my life right now and I’m just taking it a day at a time! I’m very confused but I know everything takes time. It’s really hard suppressing my feelings, too. Idk!!! I’m a big dumb idiot baby.
My friend told me today that men are opportunists and I couldn’t agree more. It sucks so hard. I hate that I have such strong emotions and that I can’t suppress them. But I guess I’ll learn eventually
I tried distracting myself by talking to a million boys (like, literally just having conversations w them nothing sexual) but it didn’t really work. But I think I’m making progress. :) I just feel lonely but it’s okay because it gives me time to pamper myself and take care of the things I have to get done. So far things are better than I thought they would be, so that’s good. I’m not wallowing around anymore, and I don’t feel a weird empty feeling in the pit of my stomach. So that’s good. :’) and I’ve been feeling like eating again. Heck yeah.
Anonymous asked: Hey bud are you ok? i know your having a rough time i was wondering if maybe youd like to talk about it?
I’m okay! I don’t really think that there’s too much to talk about honestly!!! I’ll be fine. I just gotta give it time n stuff, ya no?but thanks :3